How to Stop Catastrophizing in Stressful Situations and Calm Worst-Case Thinking
“Are our horses gonna die?”
That was the thought racing through my mind as I was white-knuckling the steering wheel, heading down the highway after arriving in Idaho.
MaryBeth and I had just made the 20+ hour drive from Arizona back to Idaho. We drove ahead of our horses so we could ensure everything was ready for their arrival.
Our horses were being trailered by someone we trust deeply and who is incredible at what she does.
And then we got the text you never want to get.
“I broke down.”
Immediately, my mind took off.
Is she okay?
Are the horses okay?
How long will this take?
Are they going to make it here before dark?
What if something happens?
What if they get hurt?
What if they don’t make it?
And then came the big one.
Are our horses gonna die?
Now, was that thought helpful?
Absolutely not.
Was it based on the actual facts in front of me?
Also no.
But when you are going through a big change, and your stress is already high, your mind can move very quickly from “something happened” to “everything is falling apart.”
That is catastrophizing.
And if you’ve ever been in a stressful situation where one unexpected thing suddenly made your mind sprint ten steps into the worst-case scenario, you know exactly what I mean.
It can feel so real in the moment.
Your body tightens.
Your breath changes.
Your thoughts race.
Your control mind starts looking for anything it can grab onto.
That’s what happened to me.
Unprompted, our driver told us the horses were safe off the road, which was great news. But my mind still wanted more information.
What does “off the road” mean?
Are they in a safe place?
Can someone help her?
Thankfully, she had been able to pull into an auto parts store.
So part of me thought, “Okay, that’s good. Maybe someone there can help.”
But another part of me was already making a list of every possible thing I could do.
Maybe I should call a friend with a truck.
Maybe one of my mechanic friends could go help.
Maybe I should just drive the 3.5 hours and sit with the horses so they aren’t alone.
My mind was searching for control.
And then MaryBeth said something really simple and really wise.
“This is why we hired her. She is incredible at this. I trust that it’s all going to work out and she’s going to figure it out.”
At first, it didn’t fully land.
But then I had a moment of awareness.
What could I actually control in that moment?
I couldn’t fix the truck.
I couldn’t teleport myself to the auto parts store.
I couldn’t speed up the process.
I couldn’t control every possible outcome.
What I could control was myself.
My thoughts.
My energy.
My response.
So I noticed the fear and negative thoughts. I forgave myself for having them. And then I chose again.
I chose the thought: I trust in the universe and that this is all going to work out.
I chose the thought: Our driver is a professional and will take care of our horses.
I chose the thought: They are safe, and they are going to get here in divine time.
And lo and behold, a couple of hours later, we got the call.
Everything was fixed.
They were back on the road.
It turns out there was a young man working at the auto parts store who was an absolute genius at fixing cars. She needed her entire radiator replaced and for our horses to stay attached to the truck in her trailer. Something that could have taken days was fixed in a couple of hours.
They made it to Idaho before dark.
The horses got out safely.
And everyone was okay.
In fact, they were joyful.
It was such a powerful reminder for me.
When you are going through a big change, stress and emotions can be high.
And sometimes, life adds one more unexpected thing right on top of an already emotional experience.
In those moments, your mind may want to catastrophize.
It may want to run straight into fear.
But the thing you can come back to is this:
You may not be able to control what is happening around you, but you can choose how you respond within you.
You can notice the thought.
You can forgive yourself for having it.
You can choose again.
That’s exactly why MaryBeth and I created the Stop Catastrophizing: A Guided Reset for Anxious Thoughts meditation.
It’s a grounding practice to help you separate fear from fact, calm the urgency to solve every future problem, and reconnect with the truth of this moment.
When your mind starts spiraling into what-ifs, come back to this practice and remember:
You are not in the worst-case scenario.
You are here.
And you’ve got this.
Listen to Stop Catastrophizing: A Guided Reset for Anxious Thoughts
P.S.
If your mind has been spiraling into what-ifs lately, this practice is here to help you pause, breathe, and come back to solid ground. Listen to Stop Catastrophizing: A Guided Reset for Anxious Thoughts whenever you need to remember: you are here, you are safe in this moment, and you have you.
