How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others When Your Progress Feels Slower
Ever had the experience where something was seemingly simple for those around you, but for you it felt like it was taking for-ev-er??
That’s what I’ve been experiencing lately with our mustang, Norby. While all the other horses in his herd are getting their feet trimmed with (relative) ease and grace, he’s still having immense difficulty.
It feels like it’s become a part-time job to work with an incredibly skilled trainer and Ferrier to get him comfortable just being around the tools.
There are moments of great improvement. And then moments that look like a major backslide.
The stories of “will this ever work out?” Bubble up and feel like shit.
Our Ferrier let us know that in 20 years of doing this work, Norby was the 2nd most challenging horse he’s ever tried to trim.
Not the prize I’m hoping for…
But then he said, “Norby is giving us this amazing opportunity to all learn and grow and deal with our own shit. If it were easy, none of us would get to become better. And that’s pretty cool.”
He was right.
My victim mindset had taken over and the fear that “he’s never going to get better” was so far from the facts of what was actually happening.
Because here’s the deal, my friend, and this deal changed my life forever.
With everything in life, there are FACTS and STORIES.
FACTS are non-negotiable truths like….
- Norby has had 6 sessions
- He has lifted his legs at some point, each time
- It’s been a minimum of 2 hours each session
STORIES are the interpretation of what’s going on around those facts like…
- This is taking so much longer than anticipated
- I don’t know if it’s ever going to work out
- I’m afraid we’re going to leave Arizona before he’s healed this fear within him and that would really suck
Now, here’s the life-changing part… you get to CHOOSE the STORIES that serve you, instead of choosing the ones that don’t.
I can still be present with all the facts and choose the STORY that…
- It’s taking the exact amount of time that he needs, and we’re not in a rush
- We’re so fortunate and grateful to have access to a values-aligned Ferrier
- I’m so proud of his moments of progress and will keep finding them and focusing on that truth.
- Ollie (our other horse) has completely healed his fear of having his feet done and is in the best place he’s ever been. Norby will follow suit.
Do you feel that energetic shift? Actually feeling like good things are happening instead of a mindset that it’s not happening fast enough?
Us humans, we do that to ourselves A LOT.
😟You look at social media, and think “Everyone around me has such a better life. Why can’t I be further along?”
😩You see people around you getting accolades and think, “I work so hard and am never recognized. What makes them so much more worthy than me?”
😕You reflect at your goals for the year and wonder, “Is it even possible for me to make this habit stick? Why is it so much easier for other people to succeed?”
In these cases, it’s the perfect time to separate the FACTS from the STORIES and then replace the stories that aren’t serving you with ones that are!
Like…
☺️“It’s so inspiring to see what my friends are making happen! They’re showing me that it’s possible for me too.”
😁 “I’m going to actively apply to what I want to be recognized for. And while I’m at it, I’m going to recognize myself with greater intention. I can do that now!”
😆 “I’m getting so much information on what works for me and what doesn’t. I am figuring out what combination works for me to make my habits stick. It’s fun to be on that journey!”
Talk about taking your power back! You can literally choose to change the script so that you’re empowered to take positive action instead of being stuck in old patterns of judgment and victimhood.
You feel me?
This has easily been one of the most effective tools in my personal wellbeing toolkit that has been one of the greatest life-changers. Because no one knows how loud it is in your mind but you. So you get to change that.
Looking for an extra boost?
Book an Energy Session with James. His new certification in the Belief Code enables him to release limiting belief patterns and negative emotions, rewire supportive beliefs, and create space for more clarity, calm, and alignment—no overthinking required.
I had a session with him the day after I felt so badly about Norby, and within moments, that energy shifted into possibility and empowerment. It honestly feels like the best “short cut” I’ve ever had access to for changing deep-rooted self-hate patterns without years of therapy.
Curious about what it could do for you?
Book an Energy Session with James Here
You got this, my friend. Keep choosing what serves you!
P.S.
Check out what Chenire had to say about her energy session with James: “James’s Energy Healing Session was spot on! The emotions that were cleared gave me a new awareness, so when they try to return, I’m no longer triggered—and I can make a different choice.”
— Chenire C., Baltimore
