Essential Life Lessons I Wish I Knew at Graduation: Building Relationships, Living Authentically, and Enjoying the Journey

It was the cutest thing you ever saw: a lineup of dozens of kindergarten students in full cap and gown attire, ready to graduate. Like gender reveal parties, this wasn’t a thing when I was growing up, so I never experienced it first-hand until this week. It got me thinking about the grad advice I would give one of these kiddos.

But lemme tell ya, I can totally understand why this is a thing now. I mean, why not create more rituals and ceremonies to celebrate life?

As Oprah says, “The more you celebrate life, the more there is in life to celebrate.”

I know I’ll be bottling up this cuteness for those not-so-cute days.

As I listened to speakers talk about the future ahead for these kiddos, I got to thinking, what do I WISH someone had told me at a younger age in my life’s journey? What grad advice did I want to hear?

And here’s what I came up with:

1. Grad Advice: ?Relationships are everything – starting within.

   Humans want to support other humans. It gives us a sense of belonging, purpose, connection, and trust – to name a few. We crave meaningful connections with others. And let’s be real – relationships help us achieve our dreams.?What no one ever told me? The BEST way to build a positive relationship with others is to start with yourself! Because here’s the deal, you attract relationships that are a reflection of what you believe is true about yourself.

   If you think you’re super innovative and creative – you’ll draw others like that towards you. If you think you’re super dumb and boring – you’ll attract others who will believe that about you, too.?Consider this: How do you speak to yourself in your mind? Are you cheering yourself on with love? Or muscling yourself forward with fear?

   1️⃣Self-awareness. Start by simply noticing.
   2️⃣Self-compassion. Respond to what you notice with compassion, suspending judgment.
   3️⃣Self-care. Treat yourself like you would a best friend that you love, not an enemy that you can’t stand.

   If you want to build the best relationship of all – start by going within yourself.

2. Grad Advice: ?Live Your Values, Not Someone Else’s.
   

   It’s key to know what you believe in and create a life for yourself that reflects that. Otherwise, someone else will be happy to create those beliefs for you.?What no one ever told me? You’re likely driving yourself to achieve and perform in ways you don’t actually care about. Since you were a kid, you’ve been programmed and domesticated by your caretakers based on their values. Which you likely adopted in return for love, approval, and acceptance in your community.For me, it looked like a raging work addiction to prioritize values like Public Image and Wealth. Only to never be satisfied after achieving all the awards and promotions because I wasn’t fulfilled on the inside.

   In my time of unlearning, I found that when Authenticity and Growth were at play, I had an internal flame of possibility at a consistent roar.And that’s how values work.

   When you’re energized, it’s because your values are in action. ?

   When you’re drained, it’s because your values are being violated. ?

   ?Consider this: Take our free core values quiz to start to uncover who you are authentically without needing anyone else’s approval or validation that it’s the “right choice.”

   If you’re hustling, muscling, pushing, and prodding yourself to achieve based on someone else’s belief system, I’m here to tell ya that your sense of satisfaction will be hard, if not impossible, to achieve.

3. Grad Advice:?The gems are in the journey – not the destination.
   

   We humans love to think that once we achieve a certain milestone (like graduation), then we’ll be happy, have success, feel accomplished, be satisfied…. You get my drift.We think that once we check that box, it will automatically have a positive response.
   Like….☑️Get your degree ? Land a dream job.

   And that’s simply not a guarantee. In fact, it’s just the beginning of a whole new journey (not the destination).

   ?What no one ever told me? If you don’t enjoy the journey towards making your dreams a reality, then you’re missing out on the whole point of being alive.

   Those milestone moments sure can be rewarding, but sometimes when you get there, you are just bummed because either….

   a) it wasn’t as great as you had built it up in the mind to be OR
   b) it was such a painful process to get there, you’re so exhausted you can’t enjoy it.

   Trust me, you’re not alone. This is MOST of my coaching clients’ stories. ☝️

   ?Consider this: What if every step of the journey was actually a mini milestone moment? What if tuning in every day to your energy and setting boundaries helped you enjoy the ride? What would it look like for you to be grateful for this moment and not just strive for something better in the future?

   Lemme tell ya, my friend. Once I let go of this “picture-perfect destination to Happyville” I realized how much beauty, growth and wisdom comes from embracing each step as if it were the most important one I could take today.

   

My clients and I have such a deeper sense of freedom, peace, and inner harmony from taking this advice to heart, setting boundaries, and showing others how it’s done. One step at a time, without judgment of pace.

?Tell me – what grad advice do you wish you had at graduation (or otherwise) that serves you today?

Here are three ways I can help you return to your truth and most authentic self:

? Knowing and Living Your Values: During my 10-day course, you’ll identify your unique values, see where you’re currently activating them, and make small tweaks where you’re not so that every day is filled with purpose. Join 7,500+ Students Here.

? Alignment Coaching: Want to start being your most authentic self? Work with me 1×1 to align with your core values and ignite more well-being without compromising your impact. Fill out this inquiry form to see if we’re a good fit for one another.

?Hire MaryBeth as a Speaker: Have an all-staff event, annual meeting or conference coming up? I will inspire your audience to give themselves and others, permission to be human, unleashing higher productivity, profit, and purpose through shared values. Learn more here.